Now accepting employment offers

Anyone want to hire an over-worked, under-appreciated, sleep-deprived woman? Come on now, don’t all jump at once. I’m available to the highest bidder. No takers? Didn’t think so.

I’ve been looking for a job for what feels like an eternity. I have had no fewer than 3 interviewers tell me that I was a shew-in for the job, only to not be offered the job in the end. I have no words to tell you how extremely disheartening it is to sit in an interview for 10 hours, only to be sent home still unemployed. It’s enough to make a girl start buying lottery tickets.

Not only is it putting a strain on our already over-extended finances that I can’t get back to work, but it’s making me feel really low about myself. See, I think I’m a pretty spiffy candidate for the jobs I apply for. I don’t apply to jobs for which I don’t honestly believe I’m qualified. As someone who once had the responsibility of weeding out such candidates in a past professional life, I just can’t in god conscience make someone sift through my resume looking for the BS, so I simply don’t include any. Yes, I actually type nearly 60 words per minute. Yes, I can enter 10,000 keystrokes per hour. Yes, I have done just about everything you can legally do in an office. Unfortunately, I’m afraid that the powers that be think that I actually am BS’ing, and therefor disqualify me without ever even meeting me. Monster.com tells me that I have applied for 37 jobs since August, and yet, have only had 4 interviews as a result of those resumes. If my best work isn’t good enough for anybody, then what good is it at all?

So I bought a bunch of new work clothes. I’m hoping that optimism and a renewed sense of confidence at interviews will help propel me into a job. If I don’t get a job soon, please kill me. Wish me luck.

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